Bitcoin Glossary: You’ve Heard of Crypto Mania – Now Say Hello to Cryptophasia
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Bitcoin Glossary: You’ve Heard of Crypto Mania – Now Say Hello to Cryptophasia

To outsiders, cryptocurrency is a strange and bewildering world. Dive into bitcoin Twitter for the first time and you’re confronted by an a...

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To outsiders, cryptocurrency is a strange and bewildering world. Dive into bitcoin Twitter for the first time and you’re confronted by an array of confusing acronyms, memes, and jargon tossed around like confetti. Cryptocurrency has its own language, honed through years spent lurking in trollboxes and forums with like-minded geeks. For anyone who’s new to bitcoin, the following glossary should come in handy.

Also read: 10 Bitcoin Apps That Everyone Should Have

Stop Confusing Bitcoin Beginners With Your Cryptophasia

Every community has its patois: an esoteric language that makes perfect sense once you’re accustomed to it and zero sense up until then. As a tech-driven industry that runs on memes and in-jokes, bitcoin is guiltier than most of flummoxing casual observers. Crypto has developed its own idioglossia – an idiosyncratic language spoken only by a few. There’s a better word for this though: cryptophasia. As Wikipedia explains:

Stop Confusing Bitcoin Beginners With Your Cryptophasia

Cryptophasia. Secret speech. Yep, that sounds about right. If it’s not cryptocurrency traders prattling about fib retracements, Wyckoff counts, and Ichimoku clouds, it’s bitcoin factions hurling out pejoratives like “bcash” and “segwetters” which mean nothing to the uninitiated. Defining those phrases is beyond the remit of this article – anyone keen on mastering crypto’s cryptophasia needs to “lurk moar” as the adage goes. For newcomers, however, the following phrases can be considered your starter pack. These ten are on the house. After that, you’re on your own.

A Brief Glossary of Bitcoin Slang

Stop Confusing Bitcoin Beginners With Your CryptophasiaNocoiner: As Urban Dictionary explains, a nocoiner is someone who holds zero bitcoin because they doubted it back in the day and, now that it’s rocketed, vents their frustrations by hating from the sidelines. “The nocoiner takes out his or her bitterness on Bitcoin Hodlers, by constantly claiming that Bitcoin will crash, is a scam, is a bubble, or other types of easily refuted FUD.” Which brings us nicely onto our next definition…

FUD: Fear, Uncertainty, and Doubt. A mechanism for scaremongering and spreading unsubstantiated rumors, usually with the intention of crashing a coin’s price and then profiting by buying it for cheap.

Whale: A whale is an individual with substantial cryptocurrency holdings – enough to manipulate the market in some cases, or to drop $4 million on a fleet of F1 cars. You will probably never be a whale, but don’t let that stop you from dreaming. Classic whale tactics include setting huge sell walls to prevent a cryptocurrency from rising further, dumping on the market, and posting screenshots of their Blockfolio to induce envy.

Hyperbitcoinization: This isn’t slang but it is a hella big word. It’s one worth learning though cos you’ll be hearing a lot of it over the next year. Hyperbitcoinization is the notion that bitcoin’s rising value will cause a flight from devalued fiat currencies to crypto. It’s already happening.

Fiatsplaining: When people from a traditional finance background try to explain to you how cryptocurrency works. Badly.

Bags: Cryptocurrency bags are altcoins that are currently at a loss and are thus weighing you down. Usually this is because their value has plummeted relative to bitcoin due to bitcoin soaring, the altcoin being a piece of crap, or both.

Stop Confusing Bitcoin Beginners With Your Cryptophasia

Flip: To buy a crypto asset, usually via an ICO, and then quickly sell it for a profit before its value inevitably tanks.

Shitcoin: An altcoin that has no real use case or future. That doesn’t mean you can’t still trade and profit from it, but be under no illusions, even if it rockets in price, a shitcoin will always be a shitcoin, and will come back to earth with a bang.

Scamcoin: Even worse than a shitcoin, a scamcoin is designed to outright defraud investors. Never buy a scamcoin, not for the lols, and certainly not for the sick gainz promised.

DYOR: Do Your Own Research. A wise acronym to recall when investing in cryptocurrencies. Assess the merits of each project rather than blindly piling in just because you heard someone shilling Gorillionaire Coin as next big thing.

Rekt: Do you even meme? Rekt is simply an internet spelling of ‘wrecked’. Short bitcoin when it’s on a bull run and you’re gonna get rekt. Buy a scamcoin and you’re gonna get rekt. Hold onto a shitcoin for too long and you’re gonna get rekt. Don’t feel bad when it happens though: everyone gets rekt at some point. Pick yourself up and vow never to make the same mistake again.

Hodl: Bitcoin’s most famous meme is familiar even to novices. But some of them seem to be laboring under the misconception that it’s an acronym for Hold on for Dear Life. Nope. Hodl is just a lolcats style misspelling of “hold” stemming from a drunken rant on the Bitcointalk forum back in the day.

Hodl hard, DYOR, ignore the FUD, don’t get rekt and you’re sure to have a good time. Welcome to the crazy world of cryptocurrency cryptophasia.

What other cryptocurrency jargon deserves to be on this list? Let us know in the comments section below.


Images courtesy of Shutterstock.


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